Mercy Project Director, Texas A&M Lecturer, Marathon Runner, and Disrupting for Good author Chris Field has a hobby that has earned him national notoriety: Chris is an extremely brand-loyal Ice Cream reviewer. Chris samples and reviews Blue Bell Ice Cream in a deliciously hilarious manner known to go viral and clear grocers’ shelves of the Blue Bell flavors he deems worthy of a review. Google “Ice Cream Reviewer” and Field comes up as the second result on page one.
Here’s the May 9, 2017 review of Blue Bell Ice Cream Bride’s Cake Ice Cream , the second viral review along Field’s path to internet fame as an Ice Cream Reviewer:
Here is my independent review of Blue Bell Ice Cream‘s new Bride’s Cake ice cream which was rolled out this week at the same time they brought back their Groom’s Cake flavor. Please note: I am in no way officially affiliated with Blue Bell other than being a Texan that eats (a lot of) their ice cream. I was not paid for this review, unless you count getting to eat ice cream in the middle of the day on a Tuesday as payment (which would be reasonable).
The Bride’s Cake ice cream is described by Blue Bell as being “a luscious almond ice cream with white cake pieces surrounded by a rich amaretto cream cheese icing swirl.” And that is factually true. What they don’t say on the container is that every bite will bring the goosebumps you always get when “Here Comes The Bride” starts playing. You know how everyone stands up at that moment in the wedding? That’s pretty much the same effect this ice cream has on you. You suddenly realize you’re standing up and craning your neck towards the nearest freezer as if to show the proper respect and admiration for this divine moment. At first you may wonder if you’ve somehow missed the amaretto cream cheese icing. But it’s there. Subtle, delicate, hidden. Just like that weird lacy thing brides used to wear on their leg and then have the groom take off in front of everyone (how did we all let that happen, by the way?). The white cake pieces really bring this one full circle. Fluffy and light just like the wallet of the father of the bride. In the end, Bride’s Cake is the delightful, kind, sweet flavor you would expect it to be. So grab your friends, bring a spoon, and get ready to remember the day you had your first cup or cone of the good stuff.
Now let’s get to the Groom’s Cake. Blue Bell says it is “luscious chocolate ice cream with chocolate cake pieces and chocolate coated strawberry hearts, surrounded by swirls of strawberry sauce and chocolate icing.” I know, kind of feels like a lot. But relax, this one (like many grooms) is pretty straightforward. Chocolate with chocolate with chocolate, a little strawberry, and then some more chocolate. That’s it. The chocolate cake pieces set off sparklers in your mouth and the chocolate coated strawberry hearts are like rose petals sprinkled across the path your spoon takes to your mouth. The swirls of strawberry sauce add just the right touch of edginess, kind of like those Superman socks all the groomsmen wear and hide from the bride’s mother. Ultimately, I couldn’t tell you exactly why the groom’s cake was so good. I mean, it was kind of just standing up there with a smirk on its face while everyone in the room wondered how in the world it got to be where it was, but I can’t fault it for that. Nothing but respect for any ice cream with enough personality to make it to the shelves and into our hearts and bellies with a product description that sounds like it was written by a 10-year old boy on a camping trip without a freezer.
Now these products may be sold separately, but it just seems wrong to eat them alone. But let me warn you: buyer beware if you get the two bowls too close together. I made that mistake and found one of the mini Blue Bell cups in my freezer just moments later. Now I have to go explain to the kids exactly how that happened. Which is especially awkward because my wife is currently 17 weeks pregnant with baby #4. Well here’s to more Blue Bell babies for all of us–cheers to the bride and groom.